CARLTON has ended a seven-game losing streak against Adelaide with a convincing 48-point victory at AAMI Stadium on Saturday.

The Blues kicked the opening four goals of the game and never looked back in recording their first win against the Crows at the venue since 2004, 16.7 (103) to 6.19 (55).

Adelaide finished with more scoring shots but paid a hefty price for wayward kicking inside 50.

Carlton’s small forwards had no such trouble at the other end, with Chris Yarran, Jeff Garlett and Eddie Betts combining for seven goals.

Ryan Houlihan also kicked three goals and Kade Simpson chimed in with two, but it was a vintage performance from skipper Chris Judd that inspired the Blues in the match-defining second quarter.

Judd quickly worked his way into form in just his first game of the season after suspension, picking up 12 of his 30 possessions in the second term.

The Brownlow medallist finished with nine tackles, six clearances, seven inside 50s and a goal to go with his 30 touches, and coach Brett Ratten said his superstar onballer would only get better with more game time.

“I thought for a good part of the game Chris helped the team and he got us going in the second quarter,” Ratten said.

“He’s a professional in the way he goes about his footy. He makes sure he wins every ball and kicks every goal. The way that he’s come back today and had an influence on the team (was great). I thought for him to play that way and lead the team from the front was really encouraging knowing that he’ll get better each week.”

Andrew Walker (36 possessions) and Marc Murphy (32) also found plenty of the ball, while Bernie Vince (31) and Andrew McLeod (26) were busiest for the Crows.

After kicking 10 of the game’s first 13 goals, the Blues led by 44 points late in the third quarter.

The Crows clawed back to get within 25 points in the last term, but where Scott Thompson, Kurt Tippett and Graham Johncock missed, Ryan Houlihan and Garlett converted.

Adelaide was also off-target in front of goal in blustery conditions at the MCG last weekend, kicking 5.11.

After the game on Saturday veteran defender Michael Doughty described the Crows’ goalkicking as being below SANFL standard and coach Neil Craig agreed, saying that easy misses throughout the game had deflated his side’s confidence.

“There’s no doubt our goalkicking isn’t up to standard. The players kept at it with some spirit but it just keeps tearing you apart when you miss those sorts of opportunities,” Craig said.

The Crows, who considered themselves top-four contenders prior to the start of the season, remain winless after four rounds.

Craig conceded he was preparing to enter his toughest time as a coach, as his side tries to resurrect a season that once promised so much.

“It’s probably the most difficult time we’ll go through as a playing group and a coaching group. It’s not fine, don’t get me wrong, but that’s what we’ve got so we’ve got to make sure we utilise that this time the best that we possibly can and get as good as we can under the circumstances that we have,” he said.

The only positive for Adelaide was that it reported no new injuries out of the defeat.

Carlton, which could be back in the top eight at the end of the round, also appeared to get through the game unscathed and will prepare to take on Geelong at the MCG next Monday.

The Crows face the Western Bulldogs at Etihad Stadium on Friday night.

Adelaide     2.7   3.9   4.15   6.19 (55)
Carlton     5.1   10.4   12.5   16.7 (103)

GOALS
Adelaide: Thompson 2, Burton, Douglas, Knights, Walker
Carlton: Garlett 3, Houlihan 3, Yarran 3, Simpson 2, Betts, Henderson, Judd, O’hAilpin, Scotland

BEST
Adelaide: Vince, Edwards, Knights, McLeod
Carlton: Murphy, Walker, Judd, Simpson, Houlihan, Yarran, Garlett

INJURIES
Adelaide: Nil
Carlton: Nil

Reports: Nil

Umpires: Wenn, Avon, Mollison

Official crowd: 38,321 at AAMI Stadium

The views in this article are those of the author and not necessarily those of the clubs or the AFL.

IT TOOK all of 15 seconds to take the AAMI Stadium crowd out of the Adelaide-Carlton clash.

The Blues broke out of the middle and put on a behind. The next three scoring shots were Carlton’s – a magnificent burst and snap from little Chris Yarran, a Chris Judd goal from a 50m penalty and then another one from Yarran after he crumbed a fruitless contest between Graham Johncock and Jeff Garlett.

In six minutes, Carlton had kicked as many as the Crows would until Taylor Walker kicked one on the three-quarter siren.

Not surprisingly, Adelaide’s season is sinking like a pebble in the pond after the humiliating 48-point loss to a revived Judd-led Carlton.

As haunted by injury as the Crows have been, there will be a searching analysis before they can come up with mitigating reasons for one of their most hurtful losses under coach Neil Craig.

Winless from four matches, it will take a mighty effort to make the finals from here – and the odds are stacked heavily against them with most of the top liners to play from here, most of them twice.

The ground was as quiet as one of the churches in the city for the first three quarters as the Crows put on an ultra-defensive display when it could not win the contested ball or make the tackles stick as Carlton ran away with it.

The Crows’ biggest concern, and it was a grave one, was their inability to kick goals. Again.

Five goals against Melbourne last week was followed by just three from the first three quarters against the Blues, who were invigorated by the return of Judd and played with zip and grunt to have the game under lock and key by half-time.

It wasn’t until the last quarter that the Crows showed some of the spunk that had them a contender for a flag last year and a perennial finalist under Craig. But even then they couldn’t slot them.

Throughout, it cost them, because even though Carlton had them covered in most aspects, Kurt Tippett and Brett Burton missed some sitters that would have changed the complexion of the match.

There had been talk beforehand about Carlton’s shoddy kicking and turnover count but the Crows outdid anything the Blues dished up the previous week.

Brett Burton missed his first three shots and nobody looked comfortable with the ball in their hands.

Then there was the turnovers. Adelaide was bullied by the Blues, led by a masterful Judd, and coughed the ball in a sea of confusion.

The Blues had their match-ups right: Ryan Houlihan limited the damage of Simon Goodwin while Bryce Gibbs alternated to keep Patrick Dangerfield and Jason Porplyzia in check.

The only bright lights ahead of the long adjournment were Andrew McLeod, who hit his forwards with lace-out kicks, and the nippy Johncock who chased them down from behind and showed a bit of dash and adventure.

The talk of Adelaide being an adventurous and risk taking team was plain rubbish yesterday – the Crows were anything but in one of their sorriest days.

If they were any more negative and defensive they would be playing in crash helmets. The Crows shifted players behind the ball but the obvious happened when they found it by weight of numbers: going forward, there was nobody to kick to.

Carlton, by contrast, played with dash, their inexperience on paper notwithstanding. They looked to intercept, tackle (and out-tackled the Crows), and were quick with the handball whereas the Crows handballed under immense pressure.

Matthew Kreuzer and Robbie Warnock gave the littlemen silver service in the middle, Irishman Setanta O’hAilpin presented forward and small and zippy forwards Yarran, Garlett and Eddie Betts ran circles around the Adelaide defence, which didn’t have enough quick defenders.

And what about Judd. When the game was still to be decided in the second quarter, he again laid claims to being the best man in the competition. He dominated with pace, muscle, vision and skill.

At the other end, Michael Jamison held Tippett, who’s either in a form slump or struggling worse than we thought with calf soreness and knee tendinitis, and youngster Simon White belied his age to at least break even with Burton.

SCOREBOARDCARLTON 5.1 10.4 12.5 16.7 (103)
ADELAIDE 2.7 3.9 4.15 6.19 (55)

Goals: Carlton: C Yarran 3 J Garlett 3 R Houlihan 3 K Simpson 2 C Judd E Betts H Scotland L Henderson S O’hAilpin. Adelaide: S Thompson 2 B Burton C Knights R Douglas T Walker.

Best: Carlton: A Walker C Judd M Murphy C Yarran R Houlihan J Garlett B Gibbs. Adelaide: A McLeod B Vince D Mackay T Edwards.

Injuries: Nil.

Reports: Nil.

Umpires: Stuart Wenn, Jacob Mollison, Michael Avon.

Venue: AAMI Stadium.

CARLTON 5.1  10.4  12.5  16.7 (103)
ADELAIDE 2.7  3.9  4.15  6.19 (55)
Goals: Carlton: C Yarran 3 J Garlett 3 R Houlihan 3 K Simpson 2 C Judd E Betts H Scotland L Henderson S O’hAilpin. Adelaide: S Thompson 2 B Burton C Knights R Douglas T Walker
Umpires: Stuart Wenn, Jacob Mollison, Michael Avon
Venue: AAMI Stadium

Adelaide slumped to their worst start to an AFL season after being crushed by Carlton by 48 points today.

After a barnstorming start, the Blues were never seriously threatened and lodged their second win of the season, 16.7 (103) to 6.19 (55) at AAMI Stadium.

Carlton kicked three goals in the initial six minutes of the match to establish an advantage never relinquished despite a woefully inaccurate Adelaide having more scoring shots, 25 to the Blues’ 23.

Carlton livewire Chris Yarran, Jeff Gartlett and Ryan Houlihan each kicked three goals and formed part of a forward line which feasted on opportunities provided by a dominant midfield headed by the likes of Chris Judd and Marc Murphy (32 disposals, 15 marks).

Judd’s first outing this season after serving a suspension was typically productive, the Blues skipper collecting 30 disposals.

Defender Andrew Walker (36 possessions, 12 marks) was also a standout, while his teammates Bryce Gibbs, Kade Simpson, Houlihan and Heath Scotland were all prominent.

Adelaide midfielder Scott Thompson kicked two goals and veteran Andrew McLeod (26 possessions) and onballer Bernie Vince (31 disposals) battled gamely in a losing cause.

The Crows butchered chances in front of goal, their attacking impotence evidenced by lacklustre returns of solitary goals in both the second and third terms – and onballer Thompson only goaled in the second stanza when the beneficiary of consecutive 50 metre penalties.

In stark contrast, Carlton’s forward line operated smoothly with Yarran and Gartlett providing the ground level spark.

Yarran was especially dangerous early, having three goals to his name by the second minute of the second quarter in a performance which helped the Blues race to a 37-point advantage at halftime – a lead which effectively ended the match as a contest.

The Blues host Geelong on Monday week while Adelaide travels to meet the Western Bulldogs on Friday night.

Sure there are going to be some who point to the obvious and somewhat more logical reasonings behind the ‘earthquake”. These will include scientificly “proven” ideas concerning the movement of tectonic plates, magma movement, overpressure and fault lines, as well as other such mumbo jumbo designed only to confuse the average layman. As always we here at the WorldofWookie aim to keep it real, and as such we’ve come up with a few reasonable AND plausible hypothesis for you to consider.

With the forced retirement of Micheal Atkinson, well known crusader for christian values in  the gaming market, and the anticipated gradual slide into the kind of territory previously occupied by such cities as Sodom and Gommorah, one can only wonder if these earthquakes are but a foreshadowing of an approaching apocalypse of doom where a wrathful God metes out justice on all of those who persecuted the former minister.   Thats right kids, if you voted for Gamers4Croydon you are probably going to hell. And not that I would be surprised if he took a dim view of Adelaide and its residents either. Our city is slowly degrading into the kind of filth that can only cleansed by a righteous fire. The streets are littered with drug addicts, pornographers, gang members, and port power supporters. 

This may well be the first in a rapid series of plagues and tribulations forced upon us by the electoral indiscretions of a few malcontents. The book of Revelation encourages us to believe that this is but another step toward the return of Christ. (If you are a pre-millenialist and still here, how stupid do you feel now.)  And when Christ returns you know he is going to be angry. And then they will cry out for Atkinson and he will laugh at you all while sipping cocktails in the bar with the Holy Spirit.

The second hypothesis is that something sinister is going on on the outskirts of our fair city.  For years the government has told us that there were few ill effects on persons from nuclear testing at maralinga in the 50s. This information was correct. Affected people merely moved underground, out of sight for the next 60 years, merely biding there time, stockpiling weapons and supplies, while formulating a plan to wreak havoc on the surface dwelling population. Of course I speak of the Mole people.

Seen in various films and tv series over the years, the truth is far more terrifying. The molemen are real and they are believed to have perfected earthquake machines while testing space age technologys to create a better kind of razor blade.  The molemen believe that they have been abandoned by society and can no longer tolerate the injustice. Lead by their diminutive leader, Hans Moleman, the molemen are expected to use their earthquake machines for evil rather than good, after years of oppression and forced labour, first as dwarves in Snow White, as oompa loompas in Willy Wonka and the Chocolate factory, and god only knows how many dwarf tossing competitions over the years. The Mole people have had enough. A video recieved by the Federal police has Hans reportedly saying protests and petitions just wont do after 60 years of mistreatment.

So there you have it, as we speak thousands of mole people are ready to make your world crumble at the slightest push of a button. I for one, welcome these mole overlords and will assist in whatever way possible by rounding up dissenters, activists and the irish. You of course, can make your own judgements but I prefer to be on the winning side. Ive seen the future and its not pretty. Thousands upon thousands of mole people treating us like cattle, taking our prettiest females and pressing them into harems for the entertainment of the mole lords, and killing off the old and feeble and feeding them to the rest of us in milkshakes.

Stay tuned for more news.

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